Category Archives: family

I miss my dad

dad Dad 2


My dad passed away Tuesday, February 9th.  I wasn’t ready to talk about it on here before now.  I just miss him so, so much.

I was at my normal Tuesday noon spin class.  I don’t normally put my phone at the bottom of my bike but I did that day.  We got off the bike about 35 minutes into class to do some arm work.  When I was about to get back on my bike, I noticed that I had three missed calls, two from my mom and one from Eric.  I immediately had that feeling, that bad feeling when you know something isn’t right.  I left the spin room and listened to Eric’s message first.  His message said, “Your dad collapsed and it doesn’t look good.  Go home now.”  I called him back and he said was already on the way to their house and asked if I wanted him to come get me.”  I said no, grabbed my stuff, and drove over to my parents’ house, crying the entire way.

My mom usually works in the morning.  She didn’t go in that day because she had an eye appointment for her future cataract surgery.  She said that she and my dad went to it together and had a nice morning together.  He said he felt a little funny but they just thought that maybe it was anxiety or something.  They got home and my mom walked into the house.  She then heard a loud noise.  She went to the garage, saw that my dad had collapsed, and called 911.  They had her check to see if he was breathing (I think she thought he was a little bit at that time).  EMS got there quickly and did CPR on him.  Our neighbors, the Mayers, were there with her.  Eric was randomly doing training out by their house and he beat me there.  I got there next, and then my brother, Billy.  It was pretty awful watching them work on my dad.  They had this machine that did the CPR compressions for them.  It felt like forever before they decided to transport him to the hospital.  My mom rode in the ambulance with him and I rode with Billy behind them.  Eric and the Mayers stayed behind to make sure everything was shut.

When we got to the hospital, they took us to a little room to wait in.  Sarah (Billy’s wife), Eric, the Mayers, and Mary (Eric’s mom), were there with us.  After working on my dad for almost an hour, they took us back to see him while the nurses lined up in a train to do CPR on him and they tried pushing different medications to get his heart to start.  We just held his hand through it all.  I think the doctor wanted us to see how hard they were working on him to no avail.  He talked to us about discontinuing CPR.  I refused to make that decision so my mom and Billy had to make that tough call.  I just couldn’t do it.  They stepped out to talk the doctor and I stayed in the room to continue holding his hand.  They stopped CPR and my dad passed away at 2:45pm.  A priest from Holy Trinity came over to give my dad his last rites and we were able to stay with him for a while to tell him good-bye.  It just didn’t feel real when we left the hospital without him.

It was awful telling the boys.  Just awful.  Our friends had taken them home from school for us so we waited to tell them until we got home.  I think we went back to my mom’s house after that.  Is it horrible that I don’t remember?  It seems like everything just kind of ran together after that.  The next few days consisted of making plans while family came into town.  My dad didn’t like a lot of fuss so it was fairly easy to pick out his coffin, flowers and service details.  My mom knew which cemetery to bury him in.  Eric’s dad passed away in 2002 from cancer, just six months before we were married.  He was buried in that same cemetery and there was a plot open, just five down from his.  We took it.  My mom wants to be cremated so her remains will eventually be buried above him.  We were so busy that week that I don’t feel like I really had time to process everything until it was over.  I cried a lot and was sad but I don’t think the reality of everything hit me until after the funeral.

My dad never regained consciousness after he collapsed.  I never got to tell him again that I loved him.  Selfishly, I’m sometimes jealous of people whose family members were sick and they were able to savor those last months or days and say their good-byes.  But, I’m also glad he didn’t suffer, and I know in my heart that he knew that he was loved.

I miss my dad.


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Filed under eric, family, kenny, kenny - 6th grade, luke, luke - 3rd grade, me and only me, my boys

2014 in review

I was horrible at getting things on here for 2014.  In an attempt to rectify that, I’m going to share our big events from each month.

January 2014

I started my first of three boot camps for the year.  I.Am.Addicted.

Kenny and Luke played basketball and indoor soccer.

February 2014

Kenny made it to the Mathletic’s regionals and his team placed 2nd out of the 4th graders!

March 2014

We went to Lawrence, KS for St. Patrick’s Day.  I love Lawrence so much.  I love showing the boys the KU campus.

We did not go anywhere for Spring Break because we didn’t want to leave one of our dogs, Camille, alone.  She was diagnosed with cancer of the mouth back in November.

My second boot camp stated after Spring Break.

Both boys started baseball and outdoor soccer.

Ryan Lochte did a clinic for our swim team.

April 2014

I turned 36 and Luke turned 7.

May 2014

Nicole came in town and I got to see her for a little bit.  This was the first time I’ve seen her since her wedding.  It was way overdue.

Luke finished first grade and Kenny finished fourth.

June 2014

Kenny turned 10.

We joined Round Hill Bath and Tennis Club with a lot of friends and had the best summer there.  We will definitely join again next summer.

Kenny and Luke tried out for competitive, year round soccer and made a team.  Kenny stayed with the same team as last year.  This was Luke’s first time to try out.

We put Camille to sleep on June 27, when she was no longer able to get up.  We miss her so much!

June 27 also happened to be our dating anniversary.  Eric took me out on our first date 16 years ago.

July 2014

We spent the 4th of July at Round Hill and then watched Meadowbrook Country Club’s fireworks for the last time.  It closed this fall.

Kenny and Eric went to a Cub Scout camp.  That ended up being the end of Cub Scouts for Kenny.

We took a quick trip to St. Louis.  I saw Nicole (again!), went to the Arch, the zoo and the City Museum.  The City Museum was amazing!

August 2014

Eric turned 35.

We took the boys to their first concert – American Authors, The Script and One Republic at Starlight.

Kenny started fifth grade and Luke started second.

Both boys started outdoor soccer and Luke also played in some fall baseball tournaments.

Luke started Cub Scouts, they both joined their school’s running club and Kenny started Mathletics and choir.

Kenny’s soccer team did their first traveling soccer tournament.  We all drove down to Arkansas for Labor Day weekend.

September 2014

Kenny accidentally shut Mac’s (our dog) tail in the door and severed part of it off.  Our kitchen looked like a crime scene but Mac was tough.

Eric and I went to the Theory of a Deadman concert (Black Stone Cherry opened).

Eric and I celebrated our 12th wedding anniversary.

I started my third boot camp.

October 2014

Eric and the rest of the SWAT team went to Iowa for a week of training.  They do this just about every year.

I went on my first Sweat Crawl.  Think pub crawl, but instead of drinking you go to different gyms for quick 30 minute workouts.

Kenny and Luke ran the last 1.2 miles of the KC Marathon with their school running club.

The boys dressed up as the Grim Reaper for Halloween.

The Royals made it to the World Series and lost in the seventh game to the Giants.  They had such a good year and it was so fun for the city.

November 2014

Kenny and Luke started indoor soccer and basketball.

Kenny and the rest of the fifth graders had Colonial Day at school.  They dressed up, danced, did activities and even ate food that had to do with that time period.

Thanksgiving was pretty low key since none of our out-of-town relatives came to KC.

December 2014

Mac turned 7.

Luke celebrated the sacrament of Reconciliation at church.

Kenny and the rest of his choir sang at Crown Center.

MythBusters came to KC.  Eric took the boys to see their live show.

Eric and I went to the Black Key’s concert (St. Vincent opened).

Eric became Hattie’s godfather.

We spent Dec. 19-the morning of the 25th with my family and then the evening of Dec 25-Jan 1 with Eric’s family.

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Filed under camille, eric, family, holidays, kenny, kenny - 4th grade, kenny - 5th grade, luke, luke - 1st grade, luke - 2nd grade, mac, music, my boys, sports, travel, vacation, year in review

RIP Camille

We said good-bye to our sweet, shady lady Camille on June 27th.

Her cancer got so bad that it got to the point where we had to help her to even stand up.


Kenny took it the hardest.  Luckily, my dad came over and took the boys out to lunch while we went to the vet so that took their mind off it a little bit.  I don’t think Luke quite gets it yet.  After we came back from the vet’s office, he asked us where she was.   I know I put these on FB but I wanted to record them on here.  Here were two cute, innocent Luke quotes from that morning:

1.  Luke:  “Can we get a new dog?”

Me:  “We have about 20 minutes left with Camille so we’re not going to talk about that now.”

Luke:  “In 20 minutes, can we get a new dog?”

Me:  “No!”

2.  As we’re walking out the door to take Camille to the vet…

Luke:  “Does this mean I don’t have to fill up two bowls (of dog food) now?”

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Filed under camille, family, kenny, kenny - 4th grade, luke, luke - 1st grade

Happy 10th birthday, Kenny!


Happy birthday to you, 


Happy birthday to you, 


Happy birthday, dear Kenny, 


Happy birthday to you!



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Filed under blogroll, family, kenny, kenny - 4th grade, my boys

All about my dad

Happy Father’s Day to Eric and my dad!

The kids filled out these ‘All About My Dad’ forms:


By:  Kenny

Age:  10

My dad’s name is:  Eric

He is 6 feet 2 inches tall

He is 34 years old

He weighs 200 pounds

His hair color is:  Brown

His eyes are:  Hazel

His favorite tv show is:  Game of Thrones

He likes to go to:  New Orleans

His favorite food is:  Steak

For fun he likes to:  Workout

His favorite drink is:  Water

My favorite thing about my dad is:  He is funny


By:  Luke

Age:  7

My dad’s name is:  Eric

He is 6 feet 2 inches tall

He is 34 years old

He weights 22 pounds

His hair color is:  Brown

His eyes are:  Green

His favorite tv show is:  House

He likes to go to:  Are (our) sports game

His favorite food is:  Chicken

For fun he likes to:  Go to the bathroom

His favorite drink is:  Dr. Pepper

My favorite thing about my dad is:  He likes to go to the bathroom

They also filled one out for my dad.  I wish I had taken a picture of those before they gave it to him.  I remember they both said that he likes to take them on adventures and one said their favorite thing about him was that he was kind and the other said that he was funny.

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Filed under eric, family, holidays, kenny, kenny - 4th grade, luke, luke - 1st grade, my boys


Two of the boys’ cousins came into town in September.  They made it out to Kenny’s soccer game, where we all got soaking wet, then we went out to lunch and then to Go-Karts.







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Filed under family, kenny, kenny - 4th grade, luke, luke - 1st grade, my boys, sports


Luke and Kenny’s cousins were in town last week.  Eric’s mom is getting married in December so his sisters and their families came in town for her shower and (tame) bachelorette party.


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Filed under family, kenny, kenny - 3rd grade, luke, luke - kindergarten, my boys